Mine and probably INDIA’s favorite expression -.‘BEHENCHOD’

I apologize about the heading, Pakistan, Bangladesh even perhaps Nepal should have also been included, but I can’t really speak for the others and I don’t like behenchod Pakistan, so I will stick to the Behenchoding Behenchods of India. 

Never in the history of my country have we come across something that could transcend stateliness, ethnicity, religions, our hundreds of languages, thousands of dialects than the versatile cuss word ‘Behenchodh’, yeah its true, the vast landscape of India, divided by a million things united by a single ‘Behenchod’

.

If you search for its meaning (it’s hilarious, try it), you would get “One who fucks his own sister” or as a less vile and more panache laded one “One who has coitus with his sister”, along with a million other explanations as to how it’s just an expression and not an abuse any more, phew, you would think that’s some hardcore abusive shit right there, but wait, understand, the word has lost its literal sense of use across the length and breadth of this nation. 

Now, it could be understood as the eastern equivalent to the western “Fuck”, “Shit”, “Crap” and “Holy Shit”, we Indians just use “Behenchod” instead.  And not just in disdain, exasperation, anger, annoyance, pain or even love no, no, no, (I mean yes but not just), we use it as an exclamation too, to underline or highlight whatever emotions we feel. 

Observe……

“I am so late bhenchod, that my behenchod manager would be angry as a bloody behenchod!”….You see, concern, abuse, fear in the same sentence…the word is pure gold

“Stop crying, Behenchod, it will be fine”………. Comforting a friend.“anhhhh…behenchod I don’t want to gooo”……Denoting exasperation even tiredness perhaps “I love you, Behenchod”………softly spoken Denoting genuine love (I know, I know, but try it, you would be surprised.)“Where are my socks behenchod!”…….Denoting annoyance. Banged your toes… “Ooh behennnchooddd!.......”..Denoting pain.“I passed Behenchod!! I passed”……………………Jubilation“She said yes, Behenchod! She said yes”……….Jubilation“Party Behenchod!! Partyyy…”…..Celebratory Jubilation

And this is not even new, though the use of the word BC (the texting version of the famed word) has undoubtedly increased in Free India, the slang, is as old as the Hindustani language itself. Someone would have undoubtedly whispered “OOOO…Benchoooooo!!!” at the Red fort in horror in Najib-ud-Daula’s court,in Delhi, on 11^th Aug 1757, Seeing 30,000 Maratha warriors at their gates baying for blood.

I could even believe a British officer exclaiming at Nana Saheb’s rebel army, at Cawnpore, 1857, saying to his friend “Well Henry! Old Chap I do believe we are Behenchodingly fucked, as the natives say. Now, where’s my Benchod Brandy?”  So you see, the word undoubtedly has a rich cultural history.

Friendship could be judged by how easily you could use the word in front of the other person. If Not ever, then not your friend; Sometimes, an acquaintance; in every bhenchod sentence, yeah that’s it…your friend. 

And that’s not even highlighting the regional significance of the word, if you are lost in India without a map, then just by observing the way people say ‘Behen chod’ you could figure out where you are, and people will say it, from Chennai to Chandigarh. “Pencho”…in Punjab, “Bencho”…in Delhi, “Behendchodd”…in Haryana, “Bahinchod”…in UP, “Bahanchod”…in Bihar, you get where I am going with this. 

And of course, its use as an abuse stays intact though now to really insult someone you will have to use it a bit more forcefully as a casual utterance won’t have the desired effect. You could say a million Hindi words in Tamil Nadu for example and nobody would understand but ‘BC’ would be understood no matter what, by the Nagas of Assam to the Malyali’s of Kerala.

And of course to end this tirade with the most important “BC” uttering personality currently in the country and saluting the spirit of the day - that is YOU! Let me know if there is an abusewhich has touched you as much as this one!